5cent Bevmo wine sale… WEDDING WINE!! (Taken with instagram)
Let’s not talk about that.
I am trying to explain her state of mind to her family. She is dying. That’s all I wanted to say. She is dying and you are trying to keep her away from the death she needs so badly. The surgeries, the blood transfusions, the pain, her deteriorating brain from chronic infection. Metabolic encephalopathy. Try to explaining that to family members…
I start to feel my hands sweating and I start stuttering… It is my fifth12 hour shift out of 6 days, and when I am exhausted my brain moves faster than my mouth can get the words out. I am competently explaining and I see their kind eyes shine with understanding. I am comforted.
I feel connection with this family. The deep, soft, experienced lines on fragile skin with faded blue eyes, are forgiving. His son stands beside him and introduces me as the best nurse on the floor… I laugh and awkwardly blush thinking, only if he knew… The wrinkly man grabs my hand, looks at my gorgeous engagement ring, then turns to his son and says, someone loves her alot. Well my face went from an acceptable pretty pink to a dark shade of purple while my stomach leaped with excitement. Connection creates life.
He said it with such truth. Someone loves her. Like it told a story. (I think this is a special power given to old people…to speak in metaphors and analogies that create vision) He recognized my story.
The ring that symbolizes my past present and future with Jon Hoover has a story as well. The diamond is Grammy’s. Papa gave it to her and now Jon gave it to me. Very special. I wish I could have met her but her story is now a part of mine, so it’s kinda like we met in a very special way. It reminds me of the movie Up when Ellie writes, Thanks for the adventure, now go have a new one! (Sigh….)
I am SO thankful for my new family, the Hoovers, my future husband, Jon, and all the memories that have been and will be shared. It’s beautiful!!!
I am engaged and will be married by my daddy on November 4th!!!
I will greet this day with love in my heart,
and I will succeed…
